The role of a play therapist: Helping children heal through play

Participants

• Emily Slade - podcast producer and host, Prospects
• Harriet Kirby - play therapist

Transcript

Emily Slade: Hello and welcome back to Future You, the podcast brought to you by graduate careers experts, Prospects. I'm your host, Emily Slade and in this episode I chat to Harriet Kirby, a play therapist.

Harriet Kirby: Yeah, I'm Harriet Kirby and I'm currently working for a company as a play therapist and I work in schools within Greater Manchester. I work one-to-one with children or small groups and work with helping children express their thoughts, feelings and experiences. And this is done through play, which is probably the most natural form of communication for children.

Emily Slade: Amazing. So to begin with, are you able to tell us about your educational journey and how it led to you pursuing a Masters in play therapy?

Harriet Kirby: Yeah, I did an undergraduate degree over 10 years ago in psychology, and I always had a massive interest in children's mental health. It was actually what I did my dissertation on, and I didn't really know what I wanted to do. And I knew like what interested me. I didn't know where I wanted to go with it. So I took a bit of a break from education and then I went travelling for a while and worked abroad. And then I came home and I sort of, I heard about play therapy and I looked into it, I researched it and I thought that is exactly what I want to do. And then I found a postgraduate degree through Leeds Beckett University and it came a postgraduate certificate in therapeutic play skills. So I did that and then you have to do another one, postgraduate diploma in play therapy. And that's how I ended up working, yeah, doing the play therapy and working. So yeah, it's taken a while, but I did purposely have a break while we're deciding what I wanted to do.

Emily Slade: Yeah, perfect. So for those unfamiliar with the profession, you've briefly touched on it, but how would you describe the work of a play therapist?

Harriet Kirby: So I would describe play therapy, it is therapy, but for children and it's designed to be for children and it's more accessible for children. So children probably do find it very, very hard to verbally communicate what it is they're feeling. And it's like they don't have that understanding yet because they're still really young of what they're feeling and what has caused that feeling. So a play therapist uses play. So in the playroom, there's like, there's clay, there's arts and crafts, there's sand, puppets, little toys, and there's some games. And this helps children to communicate and It allows us to communicate with children on a level that they understand. So for example, if there was a child that was really struggling with friendships and maybe having a lot of disagreements, they might start playing out a friendships scene, like imagine with like little toys, then what the therapist could do is reflect it back to the child so they can hear and let it enter the conscious mind of what's happened and see if they have the skills already to de-escalate a disagreement. So if they've managed to resolve it in their little scene, they've got those skills there. So it's the therapist to sort of allow the child to understand and recognise, and then maybe could relate that to a real-life event. Or if they don't have those skills yet, the therapist can create like some conflict within that scene. So sort of imagine that you like my toy was disagreeing with their toy and either see how they deal with it or support them through dealing with it. So that's just an example of something that could happen. And it's really good for like children with additional needs, like it helps support children maybe who are being diagnosed with autism or ADHD, it helps like a real good observation of like who the child is as well.

Emily Slade: Yeah, absolutely. So is the qualification that you hold in play therapy transferable to other forms of practice?

Harriet Kirby: Yes, because I am as a play therapist, once you've done all your qualifications, you are a registered therapist. So In that sense, you are a therapist, but you specialise in play therapy. And then if you do some extra courses or CBD on other forms of counselling or therapy, then that could be transferable in other ways. But once you've got the qualification, there's so many other avenues to go down. And like I said, you're already a registered therapist, if you know what I mean.

Emily Slade: Yeah, completely. Brilliant. So I imagine this role can be quite emotionally demanding. So what measures are in place to support and protect you?

Harriet Kirby: Well, during training, one of the first things that happens is to say that you may need a therapist at some point during this training. You may feel that you need to refer yourself to therapy or the people, the course director may decide to suggests that therapy would be a good route for you. Or something that you have to have to in order to work as a therapist is you have to have supervision and that's once a month and when you're training it's twice a month. And that's really good because that sort of keeps you in check, keeps you, allows you to express difficulties that you're having or and allows them to, you know, talk to you about I feel like you might be struggling with that a little bit. So supervision is brilliant for those things.

Emily Slade: So is supervision like a one-to-one meeting with a professional? It's not like you're being observed while you're practising.

Harriet Kirby: Oh yeah, so it's a one-to-one individual that you find, I mean you seek that out, someone that you have a good relationship with and you have that one-to-one and it's just between the two of you and you can It's an hour and a half of sessions and you can just use that however you feel you need to use it. So if I was really struggling, I was finding it quite hard work, I would speak to my supervisor about those feelings.

Emily Slade: Yeah, but there's no requirement to have a therapist, but you might be advised to.

Harriet Kirby: Yeah, you might be advised to, yeah, but with supervision, that sort of keeps you in. That's sort of everybody's way of saying that you're working ethically, really.

Emily Slade: Yeah, absolutely. Do you find... that it does sort of get on top of you, this work, or are you fairly stable?

Harriet Kirby: It can get on top of you. It is hard because you're working so closely with children who may be going through something really difficult. It is difficult not to take on those emotions and it's sort of trying to navigate having a, that I'm quite good at stepping away from work and having a bit of a I don't really take it home with me, but it is, it can, it can, it is a lot sometimes. And sometimes it can be even things like struggling to build a relationship with that child or you've got children that like can destroy the room or refuse to go. And that's really, really hard as well. That's something that you can. really take, you can take on emotionally as well.

Emily Slade: Do you have an age limit of the children that you work with or is it up to the age of sort of 16?

Harriet Kirby: So it's usually between 4 and 11 years old, like primary school, that school age. But if a child maybe is developmentally at a lower age, then that would still work. But I actually work in high school at the moment in a special needs high school and it works really, really well for them.

Emily Slade: Yeah. So in your experience, what qualities or skills do you think are essential for somebody looking to succeed as a play therapist?

Harriet Kirby: Yeah, have to be empathetic and understanding of all the issues that a child and their families might be dealing with. They can't go in with having judgments of who people might be or how they live their lives. I think that's really, really important because one of the key things in play therapy is to be non-judgmental. Every session you should be going in like that and you've got to have some drive and purpose and really want to do it. I think if you didn't really, if you weren't really 100% sure on it, I think you'd find it really hard. Like, I think you'd find it really challenging.

Emily Slade: Yeah. Definitely. I know that's a really good point.

Harriet Kirby: And also, you do learn this, all the training is very, very good for this, but really like being able to reflect back at yourself. Like if there's something not like being aware of your emotions, like what might trigger you, what you might find difficult. And also, if there's something not going quite right, it's reflecting what you could have done rather than, oh, the child did this, the child did that, what have you done? And I think you have to be quite willing to do that. It's not a skill that you'll just have, but knowing that you have a willingness to do it. Like I've always struggled with when the child makes a bit of a mess in the playroom. I find that really, really difficult. But I know that's my problem, not the child's. So that's for me to look at and have to put that to the side. But you really, yeah, you have to be very self-aware, I think.

Emily Slade: Yeah. Absolutely. What advice would you give to those considering a career in play therapy or even just therapy more broadly?

Harriet Kirby: I would fairly recommend making sure you look at all your avenues, where you want to train, who you want to train with. There are so many different forms of therapy and sort of know where you eventually want to go with it. I knew that I wanted to work in schools and I've trained on to have people who knew that they wanted their own therapy business. So having that intention already, I think is, I think is really important because it is a bit overwhelming and there's lots going on. There's drama therapy, art therapy, there is just talking therapy. So having a direction and a route that you want to go down and knowing what your purpose with it is, I think is important.

Emily Slade: Yeah, absolutely. Is there anything else that you'd like to add that we haven't covered today?

Harriet Kirby: I think the only thing I wanted to say was is I really like that we're talking about play therapy and I like that I've been approached for this because I feel like sometimes play therapy is still very like misunderstood. Even the schools that I've worked at still don't really get what it is. They think it's just playing with children rather than working therapeutically with them. So It is still very much a misunderstood. It's getting better, much better. But yeah, I think some people see it as playing and having fun rather than like therapeutic work. And that can look different between sessions. Like sometimes it might seem very playful, but that's, you know, that's okay. That's what the child needs at that time. But yeah, just it is still quite a misunderstood industry, I'd say.

Emily Slade: Yeah, absolutely. I wonder following, we now have all of the news coming out about the looking into how the pandemic has affected children, their well-being, their schooling. I wonder if now is the time to really start leaning on things like play therapy within schools, within social areas to work through those issues that came out of that.

Harriet Kirby: Yeah, get quite a lot of children, actually. attendance, avoiding school, being very anxious in school since all that. Yeah, and I think I always look at it like play therapy has this lovely room with toys and stand, and it seems it's very approachable for a child. If you think you've walked into a room and others just have to sit and talk, that's a lot for a child really. And I have been, children that have been referred to me said that they tried counselling, it just didn't work for them. So it's having that a bit more approachable for a child. But I definitely think that with everything that's coming out, I think that's a push for these sort of interventions, definitely.

Emily Slade: Yeah, definitely. Amazing. If anyone listening has any questions and they'd like to reach out to you, are you happy for them to get in touch?

Harriet Kirby: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

Emily Slade: Amazing. Well, thank you so much for your time today.

Harriet Kirby: No worries.

Emily Slade: Thank you. Thanks again to Harriet for their time. For more information on studying psychology or getting into therapy, head to prospects.ac.uk. If you enjoyed the episode, feel free to leave us a review on Apple or Spotify. Thank you as always for listening and good luck on your journey to future you.

Notes on transcript

This transcript was produced using a combination of automated software and human transcribers and may contain errors. The audio version is definitive and should be checked before quoting.

Find out more

• Explore becoming a play therapist.
• Discover what you can do with a psychology degree.
• Read more about Harriet's role.
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